I’ve realized something about looking for my next job.
Finding job openings isn’t necessarily the hardest part.
Figuring out what I actually want to do next is.
I wish I could say I’ve reached this point in my career where everything has become crystal clear. I’ve accumulated years of experience, figured out exactly what I’m good at, narrowed down what I love doing, and now I’m confidently searching for the perfect next position.
Nope.
Instead, I’m 47 years old, looking at job listings, and regularly thinking, “Do I even want to do this?”
And I’m starting to think I can’t possibly be the only person who has reached this stage of life and felt this way.
I’ve Done a Little Bit of Everything
Part of my problem is that my career hasn’t followed one straight path.
I’ve worked in accounting. I spent years as a staff accountant. Before that, I had a job that combined business, accounting, and administrative responsibilities.
Then my career eventually moved into the online business and marketing world.
Over the years, I’ve worked with content, email marketing, websites, webinars, customer education, sales enablement, reporting, project coordination, and plenty of projects that didn’t fit nicely under any particular job title.
I’ve written blog posts and emails. I’ve managed content calendars. I’ve worked with writers and developers. I’ve created documentation and training materials. I’ve looked at numbers and reports. I’ve coordinated projects and made sure all the little pieces actually got finished.
A lot of my career has basically involved someone handing me something and me figuring out how to get it done.
And I actually like that part.
I like organizing things. I like checking things off a list. I like figuring out how something works, solving problems, and making things easier.
What I don’t have is one obvious answer when someone asks:
So what kind of job are you looking for?
That’s where things get complicated.
I Was Lucky Enough to Take the Summer Off
When I left my last job in May, I had something I hadn’t really had in years.
Time.
I was incredibly lucky to be able to take the summer off.
And I needed it.
For years, work had been a huge part of my life. Suddenly I had time to be home, get things done around the house, spend time with my family, work on my own website, help Mike with some things, and tackle projects that always seemed to get pushed aside.
I didn’t immediately jump into a full-time job search.
At first, that felt strange.
Then it felt really, really nice.
I could take the kids somewhere in the middle of the day without rearranging my entire work schedule. I could work on something at home. I could spend time on my own projects. I could actually breathe a little.
And maybe that’s part of what has made going back so difficult.
Because now I’ve had a taste of what life feels like when every weekday isn’t built around a job.
Unfortunately, taking the summer off doesn’t answer the question of what comes next.
Eventually, summer ends.
Bills continue to exist.
And at some point, “I’m taking some time off” turns into “Okay…now what?”
That’s where I am.
The Job Market Isn’t Exactly Helping
Job searching is weird enough when you know exactly what you want.
It’s even worse when you don’t.
I can search for marketing jobs, but so many of them seem heavily focused on social media or graphic design. Those aren’t the parts of marketing I enjoy.
I can look at accounting jobs, but I’ve been away from traditional staff accounting for years. Going back would mean catching up on things I haven’t done in a very long time.
Then there are project coordinator jobs, marketing coordinator jobs, content jobs, operations jobs, email marketing jobs, and positions with titles I’ve never even heard of that somehow contain half the things I’ve done during my career.
Some sound interesting.
Some sound awful.
Some sound interesting until I get halfway through the job description.
And some want one person who can apparently do the work of an entire department.
It’s exhausting.
The current job market certainly doesn’t make any of this easier. You can spend forever scrolling through listings and somehow come away feeling like you’re simultaneously qualified for 20 different kinds of jobs and not qualified for any of them.
That’s a fun feeling.
Maybe I’ve Been Asking the Wrong Question
For a while, I kept thinking I needed to figure out my next job title.
Maybe that’s not actually the answer.
Instead of asking, “What job do I want?” I’ve started thinking more about what kind of work I want to do.
That’s a different question.
I know I like organizing projects.
I like email marketing much more than social media.
I like writing when I have something useful to say.
I like working behind the scenes.
I like taking information that’s messy and turning it into something people can actually use.
I like reporting and numbers.
I like documentation.
I like figuring things out.
I like having different things to work on instead of doing the exact same task all day.
And I’ve learned that flexibility matters to me more now than it probably ever has.
Maybe I don’t need to find one perfect label that encompasses all of that.
Maybe I need to find the right combination.
I Also Don’t Want Work to Take Over My Life Again
This might be the biggest thing that has changed.
There was a time when I probably would have looked primarily at the job itself. What was the title? What did it pay? Was I qualified?
Those things still matter. Obviously.
But now I’m also looking at what the job would mean for the rest of my life.
Can I still be there for my family?
Can I have some flexibility?
Can I finish work and actually be finished?
Will I have anything left for my own projects?
Do I even remotely enjoy the work I’m doing?
Those questions matter more to me now.
Maybe that’s what happens when you’ve been working for decades. You stop thinking only about building a career and start thinking about how that career fits into the life you’ve already built.
So…What Do I Want to Do?
I still don’t know.
That’s probably not the inspirational conclusion you’re supposed to write in a blog post like this.
I’m supposed to tell you that I spent the summer reflecting, discovered my true calling, made a vision board, and now know exactly what comes next.
I did not.
I’m still figuring it out.
But I do think I understand the question better than I did a few months ago.
I’m not necessarily looking for the perfect job title.
I’m looking for work that uses the things I’m good at, gives me some variety, lets me solve problems, and doesn’t require me to become someone I’m not.
I want work to be part of my life without becoming my entire life.
And yes, I’d really like to actually like it.
Apparently that’s what I’m looking for.
Now I just have to find it.